Grounded in reality and untamed honesty, Libby Sinback tackles the hard questions about how to create and maintain authentic, loving and healthy nonmonogamous relationships.
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We are here to share our tips and tricks for better communication and self development that we've learned along our path in ethical non-monogamy. Cover art photo provided by Ivan Slade on Unsplash: https://unsplash.com/@flowinteractive
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Two queer immigrants discuss ethical non-monogamy, queerness, immigrant child guilt, sex, and life in general. Originally college roommates that hated each others guts, cohosts Aleks Midnight + Shay Luna transitioned from enemies to lovers 10 years later - after realizing they had both stumbled into the worlds of polyamory, kink, and queer identity. This podcast delves into personal experiences of a range of guests of different races, sexualities, genders, relationship styles, abilities, and ...
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Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.
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We've all been faced with a situation where we've come across an action, a thing, a vision, a taste, a touch, a smell, a scene, where we've experienced an unexpected and extreme aversion… a squick, or… perhaps it was a surprise turn-on. Tyler, Lunabelle, Ryan, Ginger, Tonya, Tonia, and Dylan get together to talk about these unexpected reactions and…
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#403: User Manual, or Dungeon Crawl? What's Your Preference?
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1:16:01Are you the kind of person that prefers to meet someone new knowing a little something about them, or do you treat meeting new people like it's a video game dungeon crawl with no map, no instructions, nothing but a flashlight and a can-do attitude? Duncan, Ryan, Ginger, Tonya, Tonia, and Dylan get together to talk about meeting new people in social…
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#402 - More Than Two, Second Edition - With Andrea Zanin and Eve Rickert
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1:36:55Ginger and Dylan interview Andrea Zanin and Eve Rickert about the release of their new book: More Than Two, Second Edition! They touch on More Than Two, Second Edition's place as both an introduction for people new to open relationships, and as a deeply needed and timely reintroduction to improving relationships for more experienced practitioners o…
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Episode 17: Cohosting with Podcast God
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1:15:01In today's episode, listeners get a VERY special treat... Podcast God is officially cohosting with Aleks for today! THE ONE WHERE... Podcast God now has a new partner and Aleks discusses their grievances... also, because they are both ADHD, chaos ensues and random other topics get pulled into the conversation. Be aware... TRIGGER WARNINGS: childhoo…
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In Part 2 of Libby's conversation with Emily Nagoski, there's a deeper conversation about the concept of "maintenance s*x" and how you may be doing it to safe your relationship, but it may actually be destroying it. Emily Nagoski's website: https://www.emilynagoski.com/ Emily Nagoski on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/enagoski/ Emily Nagoski's…
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The one where we discuss sugar daddies, Aleks and Lily's final break up revelations, and polyamory resources and advice. This is part 4 (the final episode) of the Lily and Matt interview series.Autor: Aleks Midnight & Shay Luna
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The amazing Emily Nagoski joins Libby on Making Polyamory Work to drop truth bomb after truth bomb about sex in long-term relationships. Emily Nagoski's website: https://www.emilynagoski.com/ Emily Nagoski on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/enagoski/ Emily Nagoski's books (highly recommended!): https://bookshop.org/contributors/emily-nagoski-4…
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Episode 15: Meet the Ex - Part 3
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1:01:00In part 3 of this four-parter interview series, cohosts Aleks and Shay discuss attachment styles, Aleks' bad dating choices, Lily and Matt's academic readings on polyamory and love, and Podcast God gets roasted. Tune in next week for the LAST and final part of the Lily and Matt Interview: Part 4.Autor: Aleks Midnight & Shay Luna
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The Multiamory crew takes over Making Polyamory Work to talk about aggressive fairness in polyamory, what it looks like, and how you can find equity in your relationships. Multiamory's website: https://www.multiamory.com/
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Let's think about dating and rejection differently. Shine your light.
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Relationship Diversity with Carrie Jeroslow
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57:51What happens when your relationship (or your life) doesn't look the way you thought it would or were told it was supposed to look? Libby talks with Carrie Jeroslow about how having a relationship diversity mindset may help you make peace and even embrace with how your life and love actually work for YOU. Carrie's Website: https://www.carriejeroslow…
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If you're struggling and need help with your relationships, where should you turn? Libby shares her advice on how to find good help. Meta analyses of studies that show that therapeutic alliance matters more than therapeutic modality for positive outcomes in therapy: https://psycnet.apa.org/PsycARTICLES/journal/pst/55/4 APA article explaining: https…
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Nerding out on Compersion with Marie Thouin
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52:37What is compersion? Can you cultivate compersion in yourself and in your relationships? Libby invites Marie Thouin, PhD to discuss her research and book on this important and sometimes misunderstood topic in polyamory. Marie's book! https://rowman.com/ISBN/9781538183939/What-Is-Compersion-Understanding-Positive-Empathy-in-Consensually-Non-Monogamou…
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Community Care with Genevieve of Chill Polyamory
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1:08:36Libby is joined by Genevieve King of Chill Polyamory to discuss individualism, community care, and ways you can shift your mindset to ecological thinking within polyamorous (or not!) relationship structures. Genevieve's Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/chillpolyamory Genevieve on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3PUizxdp_vj2A5fUdBgzgw …
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Sexual Health When You're Positive with Courtney Brame
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1:11:37Libby invites Courtney Brame of Something Positive for Positive People to discuss herpes, stigma, and sexual health.Something Positive for Positive People: https://www.spfpp.org/ SPFPP Podcast: https://www.spfpp.org/podcast Herpes Stigma Virtual Conference in May: https://www.spfpp.org/offerings/p/conferences Courtney's Instagram: https://www.insta…
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Libby discusses the distinction between offers and requests in relating and how important it can be to make sure you're saying what you actually mean. Kai Cheng Thom's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kaichengthom/?hl=en Spectrum of Consent: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1kvYW4eSVKRuwUt5Mc-DnCyNVzvA036f8/view?usp=sharing Marcia Baczynski on D…
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Navigating Asexuality with Aubri Lancaster
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1:03:05Libby talks with AASECT-certified sexuality educator Aubri Lancaster about asexuality and aromanticism. Aubri's website: https://acesexeducation.com/ Aubri's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/acesexeducation/
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Libby shares her thoughts about debate about whether hierarchy is bad or wrong in polyamory. Additional reading: Lola Phoenix - the Hierarchy Polyamorous People Don't Talk Enough About: https://www.nonmonogamyhelp.com/the-hierarchy-polyamorous-people-dont-talk-enough-about/ Ready for Polyamory - Is there a Problem with Hierarchy https://www.readyfo…
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Episode 14: Meet the Ex - Part 2 - Polyam Hot Takes
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1:03:37In Part 2 of the Lily (& Matt) Saga, cohosts Aleks and Shay do a deeper dive into Lily and Aleks' break up, the evils of relationship hierarchy, and the guests' hot takes on a few polyamory topics in a spicy speed round at the end. Aleks also reveals some personal truths when it comes to gender identity and less than ideal therapists. Spiciest and …
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Episode 13: Meet Aleks's Ex Girlfriend
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30:56In Episode 13, we hear part 1 of the Lily (& Matt) Saga - in which Aleks chats with their ex-partner Lily Kerrigan about the breakup, Shay learns what it means to be Jew(ish), and Matthew Marcus ...is there. We also cover some more serious topics, so trigger warning for: domestic violence, depression, and general kinky debauchery. Check out part 2 …
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Most folks practicing nonmonogamy accept that no one person can meet all their needs. And yet, sometimes it can be challenging when a new partner starts meeting needs that haven't been met by an established relationship. In this episode Libby explores the trickiness when new relationships fulfill desires that established ones don't some ideas to he…
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Episode 12: Catholic Goths & Basement Kinks
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1:00:28In this episode, we interview the tall, goth, fascinating Raven - host of the podcast Raven After Dark. We cover everything from abortion rights and losing our virginity to Catholic school, strippers, basement kinks, and dating as a tall girl.Autor: Aleks Midnight & Shay Luna
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This week Libby shares a re-release from December 2019 about the science of compassion, and why it's key to loving relationships, including the one with yourself. The Gottman Institute on Contempt: https://www.gottman.com/blog/this-one-thing-is-the-biggest-predictor-of-divorce/The Harvard Business Review on Self-Compassion: https://hbr.org/2018/09/…
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Sacred Unraveling in Polyamory with Joli Hamilton
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34:29Part two of Libby's conversation with Dr. Joli Hamilton where they discuss how navigating differences can open a relationship and the people in it into transformation. Joli's website: https://www.jolihamilton.com/ The Year of Opening: https://www.jolihamilton.com/TYO
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Episode 11: Health Scares & Daddy Issues
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35:23In the first episode of 2024, cohosts Aleks and Shay discuss why Aleks took a big step back to rest and reset this past couple of months. Yes, we have been MIA... but now we are BACK! We talk about health issues, how they impact dating, disability and chronic illness, and - we do it all while sick (sorry about the sniffles). Thanks for listening!…
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Individuation and Navigating Differences with Joli Hamilton
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29:05What happens when exploring different relationship styles reveals uncomfortable differences between you and a partner? In this episode, Libby talks with Dr. Joli Hamilton about polyamory as a sacred process of individuation and grief. Joli's website: https://www.jolihamilton.com/ The Year of Opening: https://www.jolihamilton.com/TYO…
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Solo Polyamory with Crystal Byrd Farmer
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59:27Long-requested, Libby discusses solo polyamory with Crystal Byrd Farmer, author, organizer, diversity consultant.. and solo polyamorist. SHOW LINKS: Crystal's website: https://crystalbyrdfarmer.com/ Crystal's book: https://newsociety.com/books/t/the-token Solo polyamory: https://solopoly.net/2014/12/05/what-is-solo-polyamory-my-take/…
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Polyamory and Neurodivergence with Alyssa Gonzalez Pt 2
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35:45In this part 2, Libby and Alyssa talk through some of the challenges that can show up in nonmonogamy for people who are neurodiverse
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Polyamory and Neurodivergence with Alyssa Gonzalez Pt. 1
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51:58Libby and Alyssa discuss being neurodiverse and how polyamory and being neurodiverse can complement each other beautifully.
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#401 - Kissing is Taboo Again? - Elevator Speeches & Safety
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1:06:30How did kissing become so complicated... again? Swinger culture still features a choice, to kiss or not to kiss, that other non-monogamous folk don't usually make. These days, the stakes around kissing are higher, and that's complicated things as simple as kissing to say hello . Ginger, Prof, Tonia, Dylan, Lunabelle, Tonya, and Tyler get together t…
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Triangles show up in relationships all over the place. In this episode Libby discusses triangulation, what it is, common ways it can show up in polyamory, and whether triangulation can harm or help.
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Libby talks through when she personally does NOT opt for boundaries, and why boundaries are often the last move she will make in navigating relationship difficulties.
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What is a Boundary Violation? with Juliane Taylor Shore
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48:57Libby and Jules answer a listener who asks, "If boundaries are between you and you, then what is a boundary violation?" Jules also goes over her 6 steps to setting an external boundary. Jules' Website: https://www.julianetaylorshore.com/ Jules Book, Setting Boundaries that Stick: https://bookshop.org/p/books/setting-boundaries-that-stick-how-neurob…
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Dylan, Ginger, Tonia, and Prof get back together to properly toast Life on the Swingset's 400th episode! The crew invites back Lunabelle, Tyler, and Tonya, and welcomes D into the fold to discuss ReEmergence and discovering intimacy… again. The crew discusses what returning to normal might look like during a time … very much not normal. D, and Luna…
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Your Brain on Boundaries with Juliane Taylor Shore
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44:27Libby is joined by author and therapist Juliane Taylor Shore to talk about internal boundaries and how crucial they are (even though they are often not talked about or overlooked when people talk about boundaries.) Jules' Website: https://www.julianetaylorshore.com/ Jules Book, Setting Boundaries that Stick: https://bookshop.org/p/books/setting-bou…
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The word "codependent" comes up a lot in polyamory spaces, but so often it is misused that it's losing its meaning. Libby talks about her dislike of the term, how she thinks it often is used to shame and pathologize perfectly normal human needs, and how she likes to talk about codependence differently.…
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Episode 10: A "Wise Man" Once Said (The Gay Version)
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51:43In Part 2 of the Maya Wiseman interview, cohosts Shay and Aleks learn about building BIPOC queer communities. Maya is a leader in the Atlanta queer scene, creating safe spaces for families, sober individuals, and even straight-passing queers looking to connect and network. Check out Episode 9 for Part 1 of this interview. TRIGGER WARNING for discus…
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Episode 9: Lesbians, Porn & Open Mics
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1:02:48In Part 1 of our guest episode interviewing Maya Wiseman, we learn about her coming out story, her community queer events around Atlanta, and what polyamory means to a queer woman. Check out Episode 10 for Part 2 of this interview.Autor: Aleks Midnight & Shay Luna
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A lot of people are talking about boundaries now. But as Inigo Montoya once said, "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means." In this episode Libby explains that boundaries are not a magic way to get people to do what you want them to do.
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Nothing is a hot-button topic quite like a couple looking to date the same person. A lot of people have only one piece of advice, "Don't," often served with heaping portions of shame and ridicule. Yet, year after year, established couples seek to find a shared partner, and many folks also seek relationships with established couples. Is there someth…
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Have you ever wanted a quick and easy way to GRADE your relationship compatibility? In episode 8, Shay and Aleks discuss their 5-point dating criteria scale and rate their exes, their current partners, and... their OWN relationship as enemies turned to lovers!Autor: Aleks Midnight & Shay Luna
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Increasingly, Libby hears from folks who are interested in polyamory to solve a problem: either they or their partner cheated, and they want to repair and stay together, and nonmonogamy seems like a solution. In this episode, Libby outlines why it's rarely that simple.
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Episode 7: Hot Dads & STI Scares
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1:03:55Is marriage with kids doable with polyamory? Did Aleks get an STD? Most importantly, do hot dads exist? Find out in episode 7! Our well read guest, Steve, talks about his long term polyamory journey with his wife, coming to terms with his Honduran culture and his relationship preferences, and... his STI scare with our very own cohost, Aleks - and y…
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In this installment of Enemies2Lovers, Aleks and Shay discuss all the drama in their dating lives - from recent breakups to polyamory realizations, episode 6 is action-packed and sure to keep you crying laughing... or maybe just laughing to keep from crying.Autor: Aleks Midnight & Shay Luna
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In Part 2 of Alec and Marcella's guest appearance, the monogamous couple ends up in the HOT SEAT! The cohosts grill our guests about their hyper religious upbringing, breaking the 7th Day Adventist / Christian bubble, and if they will consider polyamory in their future. Stick around til the end for some ridiculous bloopers.…
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Episode 4: We Shocked a Monogamous Couple
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1:10:08A monogamous couple that grew up with highly religious backgrounds - Alec and Marcella - dive into the truths about polyamory and open relationships. Aleks and Shay bare all, answering questions from deep... to spicy! This episode is part 1 of the 2-part Alec + Marcella interview. Part 2 delves deeper into the couple's story of growing up 7th Day A…
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Episode 3: Polyamory Origin Stories - Shay
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32:47How does a shy immigrant kid end up in the kink and polyamory worlds? Listen to this episode to hear Shay's story of finding ethical non-monogamy, followed by a SPEED ROUND of Aleks and Shay asking each other audience-submitted polyamory-related questions.Autor: Aleks Midnight & Shay Luna
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Episode 2: Polyamory Origin Stories - Aleks
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33:05How does a monogamous 12-year high school sweetheart relationship TURN INTO dating and hookups? Listen to Aleks recount the tale of cheaters past, relationships present, and Podcast God's takes on polyamory. Tune into Episode 3 after this to hear Shay's side of the polyamory journey.Autor: Aleks Midnight & Shay Luna
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Episode 1: And They Were "Roommates"
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41:53In this introductory episode, co-hosts Aleks Midnight and Shay Luna explore the story of how they went from college roommates and sworn enemies to present-day lovers and friends. A decade after parting ways, they bonded over polyamory, kink, & bisexuality, had a steamy college reunion, and then... started a podcast. Listen to this episode to learn …
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SS 399: We Go Meta on Swinging and Making the Sausage... and talk Sex Toys - from Friday Night Delights from February 5th, 2021
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1:14:42Ginger, Prof, Tonia, and Dylan get together on a normal Friday in February 2021 to plan a podcast about swinging… and almost fall into the trap of talking about swinging. Swingset gets meta, discussing swinging as a verb, swinger as a noun, new england accents, and …talking about Sportsheets and sex toys and restraints. a lot. Help support Life on …
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