We all know communication is important. But what does healthy communication look like for a couple on the recovery and healing journey? Shari Chinchen, a Pure Desire Clinician, joins us today to discuss what makes communication healthy or unhealthy. We also discuss how to keep healthy communication a priority AND how to train our kids for healthy c…

Many men who’ve been through the Pure Desire recovery process have asked, “What’s after Seven Pillars of Freedom?” Well, today’s episode is all about answering this question. Clinician and speaker, Robert Vander Meer, joins us to talk about our new resource, The Compassionate Warrior (to which Robert contributed). We talk through what this resource…

Today, we get to hear from Robert Nelson and Annie Burt (staff members at Faith Chapel in Billings, Montana). Robert and Annie talk us through their journey of implementing Pure Desire groups and resources at Faith Chapel. We talk through initial hurdles, challenges they’ve faced, the fruit they’re seeing from their efforts, and lots in between. RE…

Today’s episode is one of our favorites! We have another Frequently Asked Questions episode where you, the listener, has sent in topical questions for us to discuss. We are joined by Traci Wright, one of our beloved clinicians, to talk about idolizing recovery, anniversaries of trauma, disclosure in dating and engagement, and more. RESOURCES Full E…

Though true healing and freedom from sexual addiction and brokenness is possible, it doesn’t mean the journey will be easy. The world we live in is still hyper-sexualized and full of things that can pull us away from health. On today’s episode, we talk about slippery slopes—areas or aspects of our lives that can be problematic in our sexual health.…

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is often associated with major trauma—wartime experiences, rape, and abuse. Studies increasingly show that PTSD is also experienced by betrayed partners. Rather than ignore or minimize it, let’s do something about it. RESOURCES Full Episode Video (YouTube) Betrayal & Beyond Dr. Steffens Research Stress Index Th…

For those who regularly listen to the show, we have a return guest. This guy has shared his story about the journey from porn star to a pastor. Today, we’re excited to have Joshua Broome back on the show to talk about his new book, 7 Lies That Will Ruin Your Life. We talk through all seven lies, identifying how they impact sexual brokenness and dis…

We know sex trafficking exists in our world and is a growing problem. But it’s not something that’s talked about in many faith communities. On today’s episode, we’re going to talk about it! We’re thrilled to have Matt McCaulley and Kevin Whisman on the show: two guys who have spent the last few years writing, directing, and producing a full-length …

“Just wait until I get married, then it will all get better.” These words have either been said or thought by many of us in the church. We assume being married and having sex with our spouse will rid us of our sexual brokenness or compulsive behaviors. Unfortunately, this is a myth. On today’s episode, our Clinical Director, Tyler Chinchen, joins u…

When addiction, brokenness, and betrayal enter a marriage, it can significantly impact a couple’s sexual relationship. Unfortunately, sexual brokenness and betrayal are not the only things that can hijack a couple’s sex life. On today’s episode, we’re joined by Brent and Nicole Breining, who are part of the Pure Desire family. Brent, a clinician fo…

For many of us who are on the recovery and healing journey, understanding the full scope of intimacy can be confusing. If you’re in this camp, you won’t want to miss this episode! We are excited to have Phil and Priscilla Fretwell on the show today! They are co-founders of Savage Marriage Ministries and authors of Savage Marriage: Triumph Over Betr…

Relapse is returning to the place we promised God, ourselves, or others we wouldn’t go back to. So preventing relapse is a worthy goal. But can relapse be prevented proactively and practically? The answer: yes. On today’s episode, Mike Maxwell leverages his many years in recovery and leading Pure Desire groups to help us learn tools and techniques …

It’s difficult to understate the importance of community in recovery. But honesty in community isn’t easy. It requires intention and a willingness to be fully known. Dishonesty leads to shame and isolation. Honesty leads to freedom. Brent Breining, a Pure Desire Clinician, joins us today to discuss how to break secrecy, how to be honest in daily li…

Unprocessed trauma has a way of making itself known. Triggers reveal areas in our life where something isn’t quite right. If we’re not willing to address these areas, they can become a major obstacle in our relationships, workplace advancement, and breaking free from addiction. Heather Kolb is on the podcast today to talk about how the brain proces…

Shame is often used as a motivator. But shame only motivates us to do one thing: hide. Shame causes us to hide because we start to believe the lie that our mistakes and missteps are proof that we are disqualified to receive love and acceptance. But Jesus’ life, death, and resurrection are evidence of the immense worth and value of humans. Rodney Wr…

Solitude is an intentional time alone for renewal and centering yourself on God. Isolation is a pattern of disengaging from or intentionally not engaging in relationship with others. In this episode, we identify what isolation is, how it’s different from solitude, and why isolation is like gasoline on the addictive fire. RESOURCES Full Episode Vide…

When we get toward the end of the year, setting new goals perpetually comes up. Why is this? And how can we create goals we’ll actually stick to? Our clinical director, Tyler Chinchen, joins us on today’s episode to talk about yearly goals, how to set them, how to maintain them, and why they matter on the recovery and healing journey. RESOURCES Ful…

Self-care isn’t selfish. Yet, establishing rhythms of self-care can impact the people around us both positively and negatively. If we want to practice proactive self-care, it will require an intentional, thought-out plan that is communicated to our loved ones. Kelly Johnston, our Online Women's Groups Coordinator, is on the podcast today discussing…

What is it about the holiday season that makes conflict more likely? It seems inevitable. So how can we engage in conflict in a healthy way? In today’s episode, Ashley Jameson helps unpack strategies for healthy conflict (even if you’re conflict-avoidant), how to help our loved ones engage in healthy conflict, and why this matters to our recovery. …

The holidays are packed with clashing expectations in relationships. Assertiveness is one of the tools we can use to navigate these challenging situations. Being assertive doesn’t mean being aggressive—it simply means clearly communicating your needs to others. In this episode, Heather Kolb joins us to discuss how to be assertive, the benefits of b…

This week’s episode wraps up our “oldy but goody” episodes. Today, we revisit our conversation with Heather Kolb on a healthy sex life. Everyone wants a healthy sex life. Period. But what does it actually mean to have one? How often should married couples have sex? What qualifies as good sex? How do you improve the health of your sex life? We talk …

We’re in week two of our three-week “oldy but goody” series of episodes. We revisit our conversation with Ashley Jameson on making a better Commitment to Change. The Commitment to Change (CTC) is a weekly tool that Pure Desire groups use on the road to recovery. But how do we unlock the vast potential of this tool? What makes a CTC effective? How c…

This episode starts three weeks of “oldy but goody” episodes from the podcast. This week, we revisit our conversation with our founder, Dr. Ted Roberts on father wounds. We discuss what a father wound is, how it compares to a mother wound, and how to recognize if you have one. We also talk through where in Scripture we see the father wound, how we …

When discovery happens in a marriage, a bomb goes off. Life is shattered into a million pieces and you question, “Is redemption even possible?” Author of the new book, Happily Even After, Dannah Gresh, joins us on the podcast today. She answers that question emphatically, “YES!” Redemption is not only possible, but probable when God is central in a…

Churches new to Pure Desire and interested in launching groups often face hurdles and feel intimidated. Yet, there are hundreds of churches helping men and women find hope and healing through Pure Desire groups. In this episode, Eastview Church leadership shares the challenges they still face, how many groups they’re currently running (Note: it’s l…