There are multiple ways to solve a problem. Once you share the same values with someone, you can deal with decisions and disagreements without generating rancor, and by exploring, you can find a solution that works for both of you. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

A close relationship is fundamentally different from others as it is built upon openness and honesty, both in sharing and accepting. This creates trust, which allows you to be more open, which creates more trust, and so on. When you are not actively creating conflict, you can actively create peace. Read more ›…

For an enrichment of your relationships and a more joyous way of being together, ask yourself, “What stops me from embracing differences?” “Why am I rejecting or trying to modify what seems different?” and “What will it take for me to move into trust and acceptance?” Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Understanding the quality of uniqueness holds a key for peaceful relating. There is only one of each person. That means that each of you has contributions and insights and ways of being to offer that can only come from you, and the same for each other person. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Your core values affect everything that you do and decide, including how you feel and respond to other people. Having matching or complementary core values with another person is necessary for a peaceful relationship. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

For the last few weeks, we have been writing about subtle aspects of peaceful relationships. It is now time to describe the five principles for creating peaceful relationships, of which these subtle aspects are a part. These are: Knowing and … The Five Fundamentals of Peaceful Relationships Read More »…

PHIL: I suggested that we write about the sense of equality between us, but Maude said that she sees equality as a measuring word, a counting up of who has done what, so she doesn’t relate to it, and it’s … How to Create Peaceful Relationships by Balancing Your Differences Read More »Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

PHIL: We were talking about why we have a peaceful relationship and came up with the idea of a shared reality. This seems to fit what happens when we talk about us, about how we are. One of us will … How to Find Your Shared Reality and Create Peaceful Relationships Read More »Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

MAUDE: Recently a dear friend wrote to me describing an experience she was having with the people helping her repair her house after severe rain damage: I have enjoyed deeply spiritual experiences this week with the various tradesmen I have … How to Make a Better World Through Your Relationships Read More »…

What are the threads of a peaceful relationship? They lie in the steadfastness of that connection. In every peaceful relationship, whether a friendship, relation, or a romantic one, there has to be both a feeling that the connection is solid and a lack of any need to question that. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Phil and I hit a bump the other day. It was to do with the allocation of funds, although the subject really isn’t the important part. It was a rough one. That was so unusual that we took a look at it together afterwards, and had this conversation. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Total honesty is a major part of a harmonious relationship. Holding back in the sense of not presenting yourself totally means that you are not quite yourself when you’re with the other person. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Formulating your values and having an ever increasing awareness of what they are gives you a strong tool to move toward inner peace and peace within your relationships. The more you know your values, the easier you will find it to build relationships that bring satisfaction and fulfillment. Read more ›…

If you want peace in the world, and believe it is possible, then the same should be the case in your relationships. Come from a place of mutuality, rather than individuality. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

This blog describes the experience of listening to another person with an effortless attention; without any judgment or comments on what is being shared. It is taken in for its deep value, as one heart speaking to another. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

It is the season of peace on earth and goodwill to all. We won’t go into where this is falling short; instead, we want to say that good will is not just for the holiday season, so let’s look at what it involves. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Whether it is your lover, your friend or a customer service representative, you can change someone’s day, with the acknowledgment that you see them as a person, and offer acceptance and love. After all, it really comes down to the little things. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Sharing is an important component of harmonious relating. Sometimes we get so busy with the doings of life that we miss the opportunity to let another person know how important they are to us. The feeling that another person is interested in you and values you is deeply meaningful. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Balance is not about equality, it is about being in harmony with another, about recognizing that you are partners working together, not competitors. This is the source of balance in your relationships. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Peace is sometimes regarded as an absence or a state of inertness, like the peace of the dead, but thinking that way obscures that it is an actual experience. Just as you can be in a state of agitation, worry or panic, you can also be in a state of peace. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

A relationship without respect is like sand in your salad. Respect need not be based on accomplishments or be earned. It is something we offer arising from an awareness of our kindred nature. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Celebrating differences is a choice. When two people relate to each other in this manner, they become a powerful force for peace in the world. When there is no undercurrent of criticism, you can have an attitude of openness. This is where the feeling of connection comes from. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

If you want peace, you have to be peaceful. If you want to spread peace, find peace within yourself. This is a process and takes a conscious dedication to observing and opening yourself to finding the peaceful solution in any given event. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Coming to terms with the fact that people are different from you can be a challenge. An important way to treat differences is to see their benefits. They bring diversity and broaden the possibilities available to you. They add to what you have, rather than taking away. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

In the face of all the dissonance and conflict in our world, it is easy to become despondent and to feel hopeless. We are not powerless! Peace is a real, livable and discernible experience. Every time you respond peacefully, you raise the chances of peace. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

The sense of connection between two people is one of those things that we don’t see, but when we look at it, it has a tangible nature. The relationship we have with one person is unique; it is not like the relationship we have with any other person. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Equality means treating another person as a complete human being, and respect is equality in action. When you accept the uniqueness of expression of another, you are showing respect. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

This week was our wedding anniversary and it brought us to reflect on what we have learned about the potentials of all relationships from the experience of ours. Here are our musings on just that for our blog this week. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

We believe that relationships, deep ones, with family, friends and romantic partners are the arena for the realization of peace. In learning that it is possible to live this way with those we are close to, we become ever more capable of treating the greater group in the same way Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Relationships, all relationships, only thrive when you take the time to keep them alive, vital and present. Often, long term relationships with romantic partners, family or friends, get taken for granted, become background to the challenges and daily occurrences we all deal with in life. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

You don’t need to feel tension around differences when you are on the same side and both want the best possible outcome. Even when handling bigger issues, know you can find a way to handle things that will make both of you feel right about it. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

We do well with deep listening and lack of interruptions when consciously working to solve something. And yet in day to day conversations we encounter a different behavior. Not only do we burst into each other’s talking, but we each point out the other is doing it and feel irritated. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

How do you develop trust in a relationship? Regardless of how another behaves, there is always an important option open to each of us, and that is to be trustworthy. We can bring the behavior of how it is when someone can be trusted into each and every relationship. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Compromise is often touted as an important part of a good relationship, but it is never necessary. You can find a solution or make a decision without either person giving anything up, and this applies in many, many relationships, not just couples. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Maude is still away with her friend this week, so I’m writing about relationships. I want to start by describing how humans work and how we got this way. In earlier species, the brain was the receiver of senses and … Why It’s Important to be Aware of Words and Emotions in Your Relationships Read More »…

In society, we hide our true selves. We put on our public face; we don’t say how rude that was or where to shove that job. Maybe these social graces are necessary for society to work, or maybe they are just the social norm, but we mostly follow them so we fit in. We were taught this from childhood on, and now it’s second nature. But in a relationsh…

“Stay in touch!” is a common saying that means more than we realize. There are a number of things that support and strengthen our feeling of connection; physical contact – touch – is an important one. It is very powerful, and its power derives from the sensing, feeling, non-verbal level. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Your pleasure is my pleasure, and my pleasure is my own. These two coexist. This helps create our peaceful relationship. It means there is no need to compromise in the sense of giving something up. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

When you have an initial negative reaction to other people, move closer to an attitude of embracing them as a first response. This is the way of acceptance, non-judgment and the joyful appreciation of what others have to say and how they express it. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

We are firm believers that we can change the world by spreading peace one relationship at a time. What seems to make a profound difference is the true understanding that we are all unique individuals and at the same time we are all connected in a familial way. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Society works by everybody cooperating together, doing different activities and sharing the results. Also, research shows that friends are good for your health. Knowing this engenders a grateful attitude for the uniqueness of each person and creates a willingness to be open and listen more to others. Read more ›…

In this week's blog, we asked if you show love and respect in your relationship. These articles cover different aspects of this very important aspect. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

We have a process of exploring our wants and suggesting alternatives, and in this way, we find a resolution that works for both of us. It works for decision-making, too, when we are not clear on a direction. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Experiencing the moments as they present themselves (pun intended!) brings peace and harmony to life and to relationships. This is one of the underlying practices that creates the peaceful harmony we experience. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Total acceptance is the defining difference between not just experiencing better relating, but for a living peace that provides deep soul satisfying relationships. This is a radical concept, yet once understood, it can become a very natural way of being with another. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Recognizing someone else’s world is different is how you have a successful relationship. When you realize their life and desires are just as deep and valid as yours, then you realize that trying to change it would be just as unpleasant as if they started telling you what to do. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

ChatGPT is a recent software project that is fed huge swaths of writing and (to simplify tremendously) responds based on what it has read. We asked it to “Write a blog on peace in the style of Phil and Maude” and also did the same ourselves. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Notice all that you are grateful for in your intimate relationships: acknowledge it, speak it, feel it. They are the precious things of a life shared: the sound of someone’s voice, their big and small acts of service to you, what you learn from them. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Maude just went away to a women’s retreat, and on return, we talked about how easy a separation like that was; we retain the sense that we remain connected. We don’t feel distance when one of us goes somewhere, at least not as a sense of loss or something missing. Read more ›Autor: Phil and Maude on Successful Relationships

Understanding core values and learning what yours are is foundational to creating peaceful harmonious relationships. We differentiate values from wants and needs on a spectrum of ever-increasing importance. This scale starts with wants which are the most ephemeral, moves through needs, and then to values which rarely change. Read more ›…