Pause. And Rewind... with Vaneet Mehta | Rage. Silly. Soft.

Pause. And Rewind...

This weeks guest is an activist, author, community builder & public speaker - as well as software engineer by day. They're also a bisexual role model & community leader so it's a timely episode as this week marks Bisexual Awareness Week!
When Vaneet Mehta (he/him) first came up with the hashtag #BisexualMenExist, he did so for a number of reasons. To help challenge bi-erasure & abuse, to educate people on bi-dentities, to create connections and support those, like Vaneet, who were struggling to accept themselves and felt alone, isolated and unsupported. Vaneet went on to write the wonderfully received book 'Bisexual Men Exist: A Handbook for Bisexual, Pansexual & M-Spec Men. A book I've really appreciated in my own allyship towards the bi-community and those in my life. And just this year, he co-edited 'It Ain't Over Til the Bisexual Speaks: An Anthology of Bisexual Voices' alongside his colleague, friend and someone he says has shaped him the most along the way, Lois Shearing aka Lake. This collection of essays is a "radical & ambitious attempt capture the multiplicity of bi identities". It's needed as bisexual individuals are still hugely misrepresented & underrepresented - despite making up over 50% of the LGBTQ+ community.
Vaneet's work now as he advocates so strongly for his community is shaped enormously by his own story... from the way he was treated at a young age by his father through to a breakdown in family relationships as a result of his identity. There were times in Vaneet's childhood where he didn't feel Indian or boy-ish enough just as a bisexual adult, there's been moments where he's not felt queer enough resulting in anger, mental health issues & at times, suicidal ideation. These experiences are things that are a work in progress as Vaneet navigates towards building the life around him that he wants featuring belonging, boundaries & joy.
And there is a lot of joy in Vaneet's life right now. He reflects on how he feels much more connected to 'Little Vaneet' right now and taps into his silly, fun side when he's with friends. Building a life with his partner is a major source of joy and it was wonderful to see Vaneet beam as he talks about how much happiness his home & garden bring him! Though it's a moment of pride, we explore his complex feelings about his debut book and also chat about his love of Pokemon, Paramore and travelling - with a well deserved break & trip to Thailand coming up. Oh and we trash the term 'Love is love' #sorrynotsorry.
Vaneet uses these three words to sum up his origin story: Rage. Silly. Soft. You'll get all of these throughout - please take care of yourself whilst you listening as we do cover challenging conversations.