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Hey there, mama! Welcome to Dreams, Dirt, and Grace—the podcast where we get real about growing big dreams while nurturing little hearts. I’m your host, Kawailani Ah Quin, a Hawaiian homesteading mom who’s juggling homeschooling, building a business, wrangling chickens, and figuring out life as I go. This is your space to embrace the beautiful chaos of it all—the dirt under your nails, the endless to-do lists, and the moments of messy grace that make it all worthwhile. We’ll dive into the ni ...
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Simple on Purpose | Intentional Living and Parenting

Shawna Scafe, Professional Counsellor

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When the clutter, motherhood, relationships, and life seem too overwhelming. When you have resentment and frustration every day – this is a sign you have been living on auto-pilot- letting life happen to you instead of living it ON PURPOSE. I’ve been there. Three kids under 4 and I decided to declutter my home and realized I was living my whole life on autopilot. I wanted more. I wanted to take action, be more present, have more fun! Enjoy my kids! I’m Shawna, You might know me as your Nerdy ...
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Whenever you decide to do something new, lean into your purpose, head towards something God is pulling you towards.... Challenges start flying at you! Does the Challenges Slow you Down? Change your Course? Make you Quit?! In this episode, I'm here to encourage you that You are a Superwoman too! Download My gift to you: Unschooling & Deschooling Pac…
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YES! Mamas! It's just as Important for YOU to be Socializing (like your kids). Plus it you are now the Example for them. Download My gift to you: Unschooling & Deschooling Packet Here: http://www.kawaiahquin.com/freebie -Kawai Let's be Friends! -> https://www.instagram.com/kawai_ahquin Website -> http://www.kawaiahquin.com…
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When your body starts to break down, it's actually telling you that you NEED more than just REST. In this episode we'll talk about How these things affect your body too: - the Season that you're in - the Relationships you have with the things in your life (& it's more than the relationship you have with people) - things you can DO to help Heal your…
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Most of us have been taught or only teach our kids about the Negative effects of Peer Pressure. Did you know that there are Positive Benefits of Peer Pressure too? Teach your kids about BOTH! WHY? because when your kids are socializing and building relationships, they will be faced with BOTH. Let's talk about it. Download My gift to you: Unschoolin…
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Download My gift to you: Unschooling & Deschooling Packet Here: http://www.kawaiahquin.com/freebie Socialization includes EVERYONE that your child (intentionally & unintentionally) interact with. Which includes Strangers. In this episode, I'll be talking about the difference between Stranger Danger & Tricky Strangers. How Stranger Danger instills F…
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Sometimes we get caught up in Making a Living that we Forget to Make a Life. Has god been pushing you towards a Purpose & have you NOT taken a Step? Have you (unintentionally) placed your Daydreams into Park instead of just slowing down to take a break? There have been times in my life where I did the same, but now, I'm living my own Daydreams and …
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Dearest listeners, today is the finale episode where I share with you my experience of the podcast, answer your questions and sum up the takeaways I hope you have had from listening to the podcast. Episode topics and related links the start of the blog My C-Section & The Feelings I Was Ashamed to Admit my two main goals with the podcast how the pod…
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Is transitioning into Summer easy for you? Do you have it planned or do you just eventually Stop? In this episode I'll teach you how we transition into Summer where Learning still happens, Fun is Included and Starting back up again in the Fall isn't Hard. Download My gift to you: Unschooling & Deschooling Packet Here: http://www.kawaiahquin.com/fre…
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Years ago I learned a simple tool that has improved all my relationships. This tool is about looking for the cues that others are giving us – and using those times to connect. They are called Bids For Connection, a Gottman term. I will outline what bids are, ways to respond, and how to simplify the process. Before we jump in, 👉🏼 remember to stay co…
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We all make assumptions and judgments of others – but did you know there is a bias we have in our judgements? This bias shows up in all of our relationships and it can create an opposition and divide in places we actually want empathy and compassion. In this episode we explore the Fundamental Attribution Bias, how it impacts our relationships and w…
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There are quite a bit of benefits to socializing your kids with different age groups! From learning patience, how to teach other kids, to having empathy, to being able to learn from different perspectives and so much more. In this episode we'll talk about it so that you can find ways for your kids to have the opportunity to gain these benefits too.…
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When you think you need all the things and the dream home to be happy…. then you realize you need to shed the weight of ‘stuff’ and consumerism in order to find yourself and find peace. Renee Benes, of the Unstuffed Podcast, shares some of her story of downsizing, decluttering the closet and what it taught her about herself and her life. In this ep…
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Our relationship to ‘enough’ can show up in all the areas of our life. Whether we struggle with discomfort, self-worth, setting limits, or offering ourselves more – we all can consider how the concept of ‘enough’ and ‘sufficient’ can play out in our minds, hearts and lives. Key topics in this episode, and related links for more information Enough e…
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Socialization doesn't have to be a "Hard thing to do". There are Simple ways to integrate it into your daily lifestyle. In this episode I'll tell you how and how to teach your kids how to do it. Building their Life Skills in Communication, Relationship building & their Confidence. Download My gift to you: Unschooling & Deschooling Packet Here: http…
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The most common question I get is “how do you balance motherhood, life and work?”. We are all seeking to have more balance in our daily lives and make sure we get everything done. In this episode, I share my struggles with having a toddler and baby and looking for balance in my life. I share the common themes I hear from clients on the topic of bal…
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There are seasons in life where we feel like we have lost ourselves, especially in motherhood. We might feel stuck and like we aren’t enjoying our lives. I want to talk to how we can move ‘away from pain’ or ‘towards pleasure’, and some simple ways we can bring delight and passion into our daily lives. In this episode, Shawna Scafe, Professional Co…
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Socialization is one of the TOP Objections that many people have when it comes into jumping into Homeschooling. In this 6-part Series we will dissect Socialization.... 1. How it doesn't happen Only in School 2. How to Integrate it to your Everyday Lives 3. Benefits of Socializing with Different Age Groups 4. Stranger Danger vs Tricky Adults 5. Peer…
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I am going to stop spreading myself thin across the internet, and I am launching a member community in Patreon called the Life on Purpose Community. I chose this name because I want one of the overall goals of this community to be nurturing YOUR life on purpose. I want to encourage you to have passion in your life and enjoy your life. In this episo…
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Negative self-talk can our work-life balance or ability to manage parenting challenges. In this episode, Shawna Scafe, Counsellor and Coach, discusses how to identify common cognitive distortions and challenge them to help rewire your self-talk to be more empowering and motivating. This episode is a follow-up to the introduction on Cognitive Distor…
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Download My gift to you: Unschooling & Deschooling Packet Here: http://www.kawaiahquin.com/freebie This might seem obvious, but think about anytime you have taken advice from someone who never had direct experience, training or an adequate amount of time in that area. Were they REALLY the best Resource for learning about that subject? In this episo…
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As a way to celebrate 200 episodes and 5 years together, I asked listeners for their questions on any topic. In this episode, I’m answering questions on the most important question to ask when decluttering, abundance vs scarcity mindsets, motherhood stages and seasons, and more from AMA (Ask Me Anything) questions Here are the questions that I answ…
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Wanted to share Our Top 10 Marriage Tips. Take what speaks to you and your hubby, integrate it into your life and see what happens. Download My gift to you: Unschooling & Deschooling Packet Here: http://www.kawaiahquin.com/freebie -Kawai Let's be Friends! -> https://www.instagram.com/kawai_ahquin Website -> http://www.kawaiahquin.com…
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How we talk to ourselves matters. I was asked to share an episode on positive self-talk and want to open up with a review of the common mindset traps (cognitive distortions) we can have. By noticing these cognitive distortions we can better understand how we might be holding ourselves back and the impact our thinking can have on our lives and relat…
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I was searching for a "Balanced Life" myself and realized that it wasn't serving me and it probably isn't serving you either. In this episode you'll learn about how striving for a "Balanced Life" will always leave you feeling like you're at the edge of stress. Instead I'm going to give you a new perspective on what to strive for in your life, so th…
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What does it mean to live on purpose? This is a question I get from listeners who want to live intentionally but aren't sure how to apply it to daily life (as a mom, because mom life has a lot of urgency and autopilot wrapped into it). I want to unpack how I approach intentional living on a daily basis as well as the bigger picture. This is a liste…
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Recently got asked: How will you still Homeschool? Will you be sending your kids to public school? There is so much Freedom in Making Homeschool Fit INTO Your Life vs Your Life Conforming to your Homeschool Schedule. & YESSSS... Homeschool can fit into your schedule no matter what Life changes (going back to college, new career, new opportunities) …
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Holidays can be stressful & decorations can be a reminder of that! Here's why taking down your Holiday Decor will do so much greatness for your New Year goals, homeschool and even for your wellbeing. Plus you still can Download My gift to you: Unschooling & Deschooling Packet Here: http://www.kawaiahquin.com/freebie -Kawai Let's be Friends! -> http…
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Your Traditional School Beliefs Deschooling yourself Unschooling your kids Where to Start? Download My gift to you: Unschooling & Deschooling Packet Here: http://www.kawaiahquin.com/freebie -Kawai Let's be Friends! -> https://www.instagram.com/kawai_ahquin Website ->http://www.kawaiahquin.com/Autor: Kawai Ah Quin | Homeschool Coach & Kid Entrepreneurship Mentor
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This is part 2 of the situations that can feel tough around the holidays. We explore how we deal with grief, family dynamics and clashes and ways we can take care of ourselves and look for ways to enjoy what is available to us. Tips from a counsellor to consider for the holiday season. Main topics of this episode: Part 1 unpacked topics like antici…
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I asked listeners to share the tough scenarios they expect to encounter during the holidays and Christmas. I will start with Part 1, going through the themes of scenarios and sharing an idea on a shift you can try to make this season, from a counsellor's perspective. The goal is to give you some tools on how to handle the reality that life can stil…
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Here's some things to Ask yourself: Not only What are you achieving How are you incorporating Rest How are you Taking care of your soul What are you Speaking or NOT Are you Pleasing Others, Comparing or Distracted Do you have Boundaries How are you spending your time? Do you just TALK about something, or do you DO something about it -Kawai Let's be…
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Fill in the blank: She is so Good at.... What have you've been told and what you've been trying to Live up to? This image has been molded around the person that people perceive you as. Because you are probably GOOD at those things. But in a society where it's Looked down on or people are Shamed for Sharing their struggles, now You feel like you can…
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A major hurdle that many of us moms to rest is the underlying belief that we need to 'earn our rest'. In this episode, Professional Counsellor and mom of three unpacks how this belief impacts our abilities to rest well, our relationships and our coping habits. This episode is in follow-up to Episode 194. I stopped calling myself a lazy mom In this …
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Do you ever find yourself trying to rest or relax and get this nagging voice telling you that you are being lazy? As moms, this can be a nightly experience, when we finally get the kids down and would like to unwind. Instead, our R&R gets hijacked by this notion that if we aren't doing chores, hobbies, exercise, etc then we are being lazy. But, odd…
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Here's the activties! Let them Bake! (Measurements, Home Ec, Doubling Recipe, Let them Shop for a Gift! (Budget, Taxes, Research, Plan it, Wrap it) Learn & Perform for the Family (song, poem, puppet show, acting) Plan a Family Outing (Scheduling, Planning, Budget, Meals, Drive time) Plan a Game Night (Games, Food, Prizes, Timeline, Group Work, Resp…
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Here's a way to continue to share gratitude in your family during this season. Activity: Give each person enough post-it notes for each member of the family Write down something they're grateful for about each person. If kids can't write, be their recorder (have them talk and write it down for them). Start with One family member at a time and each …
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Words are incredibly powerful, they can communicate exactly what you are thinking, feeling, wanting, needing, in sometimes as little as a single sentence. But that only works when we understand ourselves and have the vocabulary necessary to name our lives. Join me today as I talk about nine beautiful words from other cultures that capture the heart…
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Do you have a struggling Reader and those "suggested Reading Levels" are causing more confusion rather than clarity? In this episode you'll learn a way to choose books that will BETTER support your child's reading progress and Tips on what to do for your struggling reader. -Kawai Let's be Friends! -> https://www.instagram.com/kawai_ahquin Website -…
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God said that we need to Love our neighbor like how we Love ourselves. So the question is, "Are you Showing yourself the same amount of Love that you Pour into Others?" If you're being hard on yourself, getting upset for not completing tasks, feeling overwhelm creep in... then this episode is to help you to STOP heading down that path. Let's feed Y…
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We live in an audience-performer culture it is hard to know which decisions we are making for ourselves and which ones we are making for others. What you buy differently, how would you spend your time differently, how would you be differently without feeling like the world is watching? In this episode: The song that started it all: "Who Are You Whe…
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Do you notice a shift in your child's behavior since they've been in traditional school? Have you've been considering Homeschooling? In this episode you'll learn a few questions to ask your child and a new way to look at homeschooling for your child. -Kawai Let's be Friends! -> https://www.instagram.com/kawai_ahquin Website -> http://www.kawaiahqui…
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When we think about the motivation we have to take action, we can sometimes take action that is more passive. The type of action that feels productive but doesn't quite move us in a forward direction. This concept from Brooke Castillo contrasts passive action and massive action. In this episode, I discuss topics such as: How simplifying the home le…
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Are you Praising your kids with an Auto-response? Did you know your kids can see through your unauthentic Praises? What questions can you ask to Develop their Own Confidence? What else can Your say when Praising them? -Kawai Let's Connect → https://www.instagram.com/kawai_ahquin Website -> http://www.kawaiahquin.com…
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2 Activities for the Price of 1: Paint pumpkins > display > then Carve them Split into 2 Huaka'i : Pumpkin Patch for Activities & Buy your pumpkins at the local Nursery- Support 2 Small Businesses instead of 1! Fill your Calendar with FREE TRUNK of TREATS & Fall Festivities -Kawai Let's be Friends! -> https://www.instagram.com/kawai_ahquin Website …
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Footprint Ghost/ candy corn Canvas Here's an Example of the Canvas we Used https://www.michaels.com/product/cre-canvas-panel-8x8-5pk-10634869?cm_mmc=PLASearch-_-google-_-MICH_Shopping_US_N_Kids_N_PMAX_BOPIS_N-_-&Kenshoo_ida=&kpid=go_cmp-18514200221_adg-_ad-__dev-c_ext-_prd-10634869&gclid=Cj0KCQjw1aOpBhCOARIsACXYv-cW1gwVmcawAnXa8GQmXxxzcq2AA9WxFFIrV…
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This is part two of a two-part series about planning your day. If you haven't listened to part one (episode 189), I highly recommend you do so and then come right back to listen to this one. Join me as I guide you through a typical day in my life as a work-from-home mom. I discuss how I use time-blocking, rhythms and answer your questions . In this…
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Planning your day, week, month, even year is a great way to stay organized and on top of life, but it can become overwhelming and cluttered very quickly if you are not careful. When we plan without intention, and without knowing what the important things are, then we will be stuck in a lot of distractions and autopilot priorities. Join me in the fi…
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Are you utilizing your Library to it's fullest potential? Listen in on How we are utilizing the Library in our Homeschool & What Life Skills they're getting out of it! -Kawai Let's be Friends! -> https://www.instagram.com/kawai_ahquin Website -> http://www.kawaiahquin.comAutor: Kawai Ah Quin | Homeschool Coach & Kid Entrepreneurship Mentor
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Include Fast 3 for an Quick Meal Make Extra of a Big Pot Meal, Freeze them & Re-heat Soups & Sandwiches Make Extra Pre-cooked Meats, Freeze them & Re-heat Have an Appetizer Dinner -Kawai Let's be Friends! -> https://www.instagram.com/kawai_ahquin Website -> http://www.kawaiahquin.comAutor: Kawai Ah Quin | Homeschool Coach & Kid Entrepreneurship Mentor
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