The Self-Driven Child podcast

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Curated Questions: Conversations Celebrating the Power of Questions!

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A Fork, A Precipice, A Decision 24:42

14 dni temu24:42

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24:42

Episode Notes [01:14] Unexpected Email from Employer [05:49] The Deferred Resignation Program [06:34] Initial Reactions and Concerns [08:01] Evaluating the Offer [08:21] Enhanced Standards of Conduct [08:55] Personal Reflections and Concerns [12:21] Seeking Advice and Making a Decision [13:01] Option One: Do Not Resign [14:56] Option Two: Resign [16:44] Insights from Conversations [21:30] Making The Decision [23:51] Final Thoughts and Gratitude Resources Mentioned Sebastian Junger The Soul of Shame by Curt Thompson Donald Trump Elon Musk Steve Bannon Russell Vought Derek Sivers Sumner Crenshaw Brian Fretwell at Finding Good Chad Littlefield The Thought Leaders Practice by Matt Church Simon Cowell Beauty Pill Producer Ben Ford Questions Asked Is it legitimate, and can it be trusted? How are you feeling? What questions come to your mind? Where does your mind go? Are you seeking safety? Would this have been an adrenaline rush as you raced to send the resignation response? What an "enhanced standard" regarding loyalty and trustworthiness was? What are these new "enhanced standards?" Are they beyond what my Constitutional oath requires? If I don't resign, how bright will the target on my back glow? My leadership has supported all my work, but would termination direction come from higher up the chain of command? What would you recommend if we talked over coffee? What questions would you ask? How would you use listening? How would you use silence? How is this scenario playing out in your mind and body? What is coming to the surface for you? How might that influence what you are about to say to me? What are the chances of my name popping on a list and getting fired? How about the chances of being part of an official Reduction in Force and early retirement? Would the administration make a better offer? What do I know about the pending job market? What did I expect the workplace to be like and did I want to be there as the contractions took place? Will the administration pay me through the end of September or will they renege? Can I sufficiently build the Curated Questions business to transition by 1 October? - Do I have the faith or confidence to step into this future as a sole practitioner and grow Curated Questions into all I envisioned? Was this purpose calling? What would I expect the job market to look like at the end of summer if I hadn't developed the income streams to maintain our lifestyle? What is your recommendation? Did it change from your initial recommendation? Where in your body are you feeling the uncertainty? Are you processing this scenario in parallel with your decision as if you had received the email? What additional questions should I have considered? Who else should I have consulted with? How would you have changed my risk rating? What is the correct length of the pregnant pause before making an important announcement? What processes would you use in my circumstance, and what would be different? What questions are at the top of your list to get to a decision? Who would be the members of your pantheon you would counsel with to gain clarity? Apart from the heady analysis, what other key practices would you include in your journey through a similar situation?…

The Self-Driven Child

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Helping parents raise kids with healthy motivation and resilience in facing life's challenges. Oh, and having more fun while doing it!

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#Ned Johnson #Fitness #Parenting #Podcasting Education #Self-Improvement #Mental Health

The Self-Driven Child

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updated 3 dni temu

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Helping parents raise kids with healthy motivation and resilience in facing life's challenges. Oh, and having more fun while doing it!

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#Ned Johnson #Fitness #Parenting #Podcasting Education #Self-Improvement #Mental Health

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The Self-Driven Child

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Our New Book! The Seven Principles For Raising a Self-Driven Child: A Workbook 39:06

3 dni temu39:06

39:06

In this very special episode, I sit down with my friend and co-author Dr. Bill Stixrud to celebrate the arrival of our third “baby” — our brand new book, The Seven Principles for Raising a Self-Driven Child: A Workbook . If you’ve ever read our earlier books ( The Self-Driven Child and What Do You Say? ), and found yourself thinking, “I love these ideas, but how do I actually apply them?”—this episode (and this book!) is for you. We created this workbook to help you go beyond the theory and actually make the Self-Driven Child way your way. Bill and I unpack the inspiration behind the workbook and walk through the seven core principles that anchor it. We talk about everything from building calm, connected homes to the delicate art of motivating kids without trying to change them. Along the way, we share powerful stories from families we’ve worked with, lessons from years of practice, and candid reflections from our own parenting journeys. This episode has actionable insights to support you—and your kids—in building a happier, healthier, and more autonomous life. Episode Highlights: [0:00] - Kicking things off with the big news: our new book has officially launched! [3:00] - Why we wrote a workbook and how it supports parents in putting ideas into practice. [6:24] - How old myths about parenting can derail connection, and why reflecting is essential. [8:39] - Real-life stories of transformation when parents shift their approach. [11:15] - It takes practice to make new parenting habits stick—why this book is about just that. [13:25] - Diving into the first principle: “Put connection first” and why it matters most. [15:00] - Principle #2: Be a consultant, not the boss—fostering autonomy through trust. [16:19] - Communicating healthy vs. toxic expectations—and the power of belief in your kid. [17:33] - Why kids need an accurate model of reality (and success isn't a straight line). [21:03] - Motivating kids without trying to change them—how to be more effective and empathetic. [24:22] - The critical role of being a non-anxious presence and how it strengthens the whole family. [25:14] - Principle #6: Practicing radical digital downtime for mental clarity and brain health. [26:26] - Bonus chapter! What education could look like if we built it around brains, not just grades. [33:51] - Our favorite exercises from the workbook—and how they’ll help you build connection and effectiveness. Links & Resources: To order The Seven Principles for Raising a Self-Driven Child: A Workbook: https://politics-prose.com/book/9780143138259 If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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From Damsel in Distress to Superhero: The Making of a Teen Mental Health Advocate For Students 53:12

4 weeks temu53:12

53:12

If you've ever felt like the challenges of school, stress, and expectations are just too much, you’re not alone. In this episode, I sit down with the incredible Riana Alexander, a college freshman and mental health advocate, who turned her own struggles into a movement for change. Riana opens up about her journey—from a high-achieving student battling anxiety and depression to the founder of Arizona Students for Mental Health , a nonprofit dedicated to improving mental health resources in schools. We also dive into her fight for change within her school district, the resistance she faced, and the powerful impact she and her peers have made. We also discuss the misconceptions around mental health, the role schools should play in student well-being, and how adults can better support struggling teens. If you’re a student, a parent, or an educator, this conversation will challenge and inspire you. A quick content note: We do discuss suicidal ideation and suicide in this episode. If you or someone you know needs support, call 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. Episode Highlights: [3:10] – Meet Riana: A college student, mental health advocate, and founder of Arizona Students for Mental Health . [5:49] – Riana’s struggle with anxiety and depression during high school and how she found her way forward. [7:55] – The disconnect between academic pressure and mental health—and how schools often miss the signs. [12:45] – The tragic events that sparked Riana’s advocacy work. [15:40] – Facing school board resistance: “This isn’t a school problem”. [25:42] – How student-led advocacy finally pushed the district to take action. [30:29] – The launch of the Hope Institute and its life-saving impact. [32:34] – What adults can do to support struggling teens. [42:16] – The importance of asking direct questions about mental health. [49:27] – Why open conversations and community involvement are key to change. Links & Resources: Suicide Prevention Hotline: https://988lifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox How to talk to someone who may be in crisis: https://jedfoundation.org/resource/how-to-ask-someone-if-theyre-thinking-about-suicide/ Washington Post article featuring Riana Alexander https://wapo.st/3Qvyyd7 Arizona Students For Mental Health: Website: https://azstudentsformenta.wixsite.com/azsfmh Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/azstudentsformentalhealth/ Children's Risk of Suicide Rises on School Days: https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/childrens-risk-of-suicide-increases-on-school-days/ If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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A Superhero For Student Autonomy in Schools: Talking With Mike Nicholson About What Works 50:54

5 weeks temu50:54

50:54

Hey folks, Ned here! You know how much we all want our kids and students to thrive, but sometimes, despite our best efforts, it feels like we’re stuck in the same old patterns that just don’t work. That’s why I’m thrilled about today’s episode. We’re talking about the concept of student autonomy—why it’s crucial for engagement, learning, and even mental health. And joining me is someone who’s not just talking about change but making it happen: longtime educator and reformer Mike Nicholson. Mike has spent decades in education, from being a teacher to a superintendent to a consultant, and now he’s working directly with schools to help them give students more meaningful control over their learning. We talk about what happens when students have more agency, the impact of constant micromanagement in schools, and how even small changes—like making homework optional—can lead to huge shifts. If you’ve ever wondered why student engagement drops as they move through school or how we can turn things around, this conversation is for you! Episode Highlights: [2:46] – Mike Nicholson’s journey in education and why he’s passionate about student autonomy. [4:42] – The shocking decline of student engagement as they progress through school. [6:44] – Why behaviorism (carrots and sticks) isn’t working in education. [10:49] – What educators discover when they shadow students for a full school day. [14:23] – Would any adult willingly go through what we put students through? [22:04] – What school handbooks reveal about the culture of control in education. [33:09] – The case for making homework optional—especially in math! [41:46] – A real-world example of a school successfully giving students more control. [45:51] – Shifting school from something kids "have to do" to something they want to do. Links & Resources: Learning InspirED: https://www.learninspired.org/ Download the Autonomy Breakdown: https://drive.google.com/file/d/13O75KCX6TFUPZ8jK6W2aYOlY7M_eWyLD/view If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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What I Learned About Motivation From "Ghost Buster" Yegor Denisov-blanch 48:03

7 weeks temu48:03

48:03

What if some of the people on your team weren’t actually working—but just good at looking busy? In this episode, I sit down with Yegor Denisov-Blanch to discuss a fascinating and troubling trend in the tech world: ghost engineers . These are software developers whose productivity is so low that they barely contribute—yet they manage to stay employed. Yegor, a researcher dedicated to improving software engineering performance, dives into what causes this phenomenon, why it’s more common than you’d think, and how it affects company culture, team morale, and overall efficiency. But instead of just calling them out, his goal is to understand why this happens—and how to fix it. We also explore how the same disengagement issues that plague workplaces show up in schools. Yegor shares his own unconventional education journey, having dropped out of the traditional system at 14, teaching himself to code, and later excelling in university. What does this say about the way we measure productivity and success—not just in work, but in learning? Episode Highlights: [00:49] - What exactly is a ghost engineer, and why are companies unknowingly paying them? [03:41] - The research behind software engineer performance and why measuring it has been difficult. [06:38] - How ghost engineers operate—are they just lazy, or is there something deeper going on? [10:41] - The surprising psychological and workplace culture factors that push employees toward disengagement. [15:22] - The role of trust in the workplace and why micromanagement can actually increase disengagement. [23:30] - How remote work has changed productivity—for better and worse. [25:18] - Yegor’s unconventional education journey: Dropping out of 8th grade, starting a business at 14, and later graduating top of his class. [32:24] - How personalized learning and self-directed education could prevent disengagement in students before they enter the workforce. [40:30] - The bigger mission: Not just exposing ghost engineers, but fixing the system so they don’t need to exist. Links & Resources: Are ‘ghost engineers’ real? Seeking Silicon Valley’s least productive coders: https://www.washingtonpost.com/technology/2024/12/08/ghost-engineers-programming-productivity-coding/ Stanford Research: Measuring Software Engineering Productivity: https://dpe.org/sessions/simon-obstbaum-yegor-denisov-blanch/stanford-research-measuring-software-engineering-productivity/ If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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Student Autonomy in School: Yep, It's Possible! 52:37

9 weeks temu52:37

52:37

In this episode, I sit down with Amy Buckman, an incredible educator and school counselor from Ohio. Amy has spent 19 years helping students navigate everything from mental health challenges to career counseling, all while motivating them to achieve their goals. We dive deep into the concept of student autonomy and how it’s transforming schools through an innovative three-year grant program aimed at fostering student engagement and agency. Amy shares how her district is reimagining education by focusing on what really motivates students, exploring concepts like Flex Fridays, and even shadowing students to understand their daily challenges. If you’ve ever wondered how schools can adapt to meet the needs of a changing world while supporting kids’ mental health and academic growth, this episode is packed with insights you won’t want to miss! Episode Highlights: [03:13] - Amy shares her background and her role as a school counselor. [08:29] - Discussion on the three-year grant program promoting student agency. [14:17] - Insights from shadowing students to better understand their school day. [22:35] - How Flex Fridays aim to spark deeper learning and engagement. [30:55] - Overcoming systemic barriers to create better learning environments. [37:05] - The impact of giving students a voice in school decisions. [42:07] - How passion-driven learning leads to happier, more motivated students. Links & Resources: Student Autonomy & Engagement: https://www.brookings.edu/articles/the-disengagement-gap/ A School of Our Own: https://thenewpress.com/books/school-of-our-own If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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The Disengaged Teen Part 2 37:27

10 weeks temu37:27

37:27

In this follow-up episode, I continue my conversation with Rebecca Winthrop and Jenny Anderson, authors of The Disengaged Teen: Helping Kids Learn Better, Feel Better, and Live Better . We dive deeper into the strategies parents and educators can use to support kids who feel stuck in “passenger mode.” From fostering autonomy to the importance of relational health, Rebecca and Jenny share actionable insights grounded in science and their own life experiences. We also explore what it takes to help kids move from disengagement to becoming true “explorers,” igniting curiosity and confidence. Whether you’re a parent, teacher, or simply passionate about education, this episode offers powerful takeaways on how to redefine achievement, support mental health, and create environments where kids can thrive. Episode Highlights: [0:00] - Kicking off Part 2: How nagging impacts kids’ learning and why relational health matters. [2:29] - Tips for parents to help kids stuck in “passenger mode.” [5:09] - The importance of pursuing interests—even if it’s crocheting or skateboarding. [7:50] - A pottery class transforms one student’s approach to learning and growth. [13:05] - The role of relational health in building resilience and curiosity. [17:37] - Technology, sleep, and setting boundaries at home. [21:23] - How curiosity can help kids engage deeply in school and beyond. [30:58] - Easy, practical strategies for teachers to support autonomy and agency in classrooms. [34:08] - Final reflections on creating an environment where kids can learn, feel, and live better. Links & Resources: Rebecca and Jenny's book: The Disengaged Teen: Helping Kids Learn Better, Feel Better, and Live Better If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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The Disengaged Teen Part 1 34:57

11 weeks temu34:57

34:57

Are you worried about how engaged your child is in school and their learning? You’re not alone. In this episode of The Self-Driven Child Podcast , I sit down with two powerhouse guests—Rebecca Winthrop and Jenny Anderson—authors of the book The Disengaged Teen: Helping Kids Learn Better, Feel Better, and Live Better . Together, we dive into the alarming trends of disengagement among kids as they transition from tots to teens and why so many high schoolers feel disconnected from their education. Rebecca and Jenny share their personal experiences, surprising research findings, and practical strategies that empower kids to take charge of their learning. We discuss the crucial role of agency in fostering curiosity and resilience, why high achievement doesn’t have to come at the expense of mental health, and how even "problem kids" can thrive when they find their spark. This is Part 1 of our conversation, and you won’t want to miss it. Episode Highlights: [0:50] - Introduction: Why teen disengagement should concern us all. [2:00] - Meet Rebecca and Jenny: Their unique journeys into education and child development. [10:13] - The shocking statistics on student engagement: Why it plummets after third grade. [18:24] - Agency and engagement: The secret sauce for learning success. [21:23] - Four modes of student engagement: Passenger, achiever, resistor, and explorer. [28:11] - The neuroscience of nagging: Why it shuts down problem-solving in teens. [32:31] - The primal need for respect: How it shapes teen development and parent relationships. Links & Resources: Rebecca and Jenny's book: The Disengaged Teen: Helping Kids Learn Better, Feel Better, and Live Better If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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Independent Travel: A low-cost, high-impact way to prepare teens for college and life 52:56

18 weeks temu52:56

52:56

Ready to ignite your child’s wanderlust? In this episode of The Self-Driven Child Podcast, I sit down with the incredible Blake Bole, an expert in self-directed learning and international travel for teens and young adults. From unschooling to transformative travel experiences, Blake shares how navigating the world independently helps young people develop autonomy, financial responsibility, and stress tolerance—essential skills for life. We explore the power of independent travel, the magic of gap years, and how simple, unstructured adventures can foster confidence and resilience. Episode Highlights: [00:56] - Introducing Blake Bole: A lifelong traveler and advocate for unschooling and alternative education. [03:22] - What is unschooling? Blake explains this full-time self-directed learning approach. [06:25] - How travel fosters independence and resilience in young people. [08:59] - The importance of managing money and decision-making during travel. [12:07] - Stories of thrift and teamwork among teens learning to feed themselves on a budget. [18:38] - The transformative power of gap years and independent travel experiences. [28:01] - Overcoming fears about safety and risk in travel for young people. [34:22] - Micro-adventures and creative challenges that foster self-reliance. [42:45] - Blake’s “Gap Year Launch Pad” program: A structured way to start independent travel. [48:03] - The lifelong benefits of developing autonomy, mastery, and purpose through travel. Links & Resources: Blake’s Website: https://www.blakeboles.com/2016/10/take-self-directed-gap-year-zero-starting-funds/ The Nurture Assumption: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Nurture_Assumption If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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The SAT, ACT, and Other Four-Letter Words: What Do You Say When Your Kid's Scores are Low? 22:35

19 weeks temu22:35

22:35

Let’s talk about a reality that many parents and teens face: handling disappointing standardized test scores. It’s a topic that stirs up all kinds of feelings—stress, doubt, frustration—and how we as parents respond makes all the difference. I share how common phrases, despite being well-intentioned, can unintentionally add pressure or shut down meaningful conversations. You’ll walk away with a better understanding of what to say to your teen when they’re disappointed and how to be that steady, supportive presence they need most. Whether it’s the PSAT, SAT, ACT, or any high-stakes test, your words matter and can make a world of difference in guiding them through it. Episode Highlights: [0:00] Introduction and why test scores stir deep emotions for both kids and parents. [3:15] Understanding the language of support: what to avoid and why. [6:00] “But you’re smarter than this”—how this phrase backfires and what to say instead. [10:20] Shifting from dismissive comments like “It’s just anxiety” to more validating responses. [13:45] The problem with labeling mistakes as “stupid” and how to reframe them as learning opportunities. [16:30] Why “I don’t care as long as you did your best” can feel like hidden pressure. [19:00] Building trust and resilience by being a non-judgmental, safe base for your teen. If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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A Sense of Control Continued: How Students Achieve Academic Success With Less Stress 24:07

20 weeks temu24:07

24:07

In this continuation episode, I’m back with Dr. Bill Stixrud for part two of our discussion that digs into the realities of raising kids in high-pressure academic environments. We explore the subtle yet powerful concept of being a “non-anxious presence” as a parent and what that really means when guiding children through challenges. Bill and I touch on real stories from our practices and new strategies that emphasize motivation without pushing too hard—helping kids build resilience, autonomy, and self-confidence in a world brimming with expectations. Episode Highlights: [0:00] Introduction to being a “non-anxious presence” and its impact on children. [2:00] The evolving understanding of managing kids' anxiety and why avoiding stressors doesn’t help. [5:30] A powerful story about test anxiety and breaking the cycle of fear-based motivation. [8:15] Why taking the long view on a child’s development can alleviate immediate parental stress. [10:45] The superhero analogy: overcoming struggles as a source of confidence and growth. [12:50] Fourth principle: motivating kids without trying to change them, exploring self-determination theory. [15:00] The SPACE program and supportive parenting techniques that work without direct intervention. [17:35] Real-life success stories from using supportive statements to build independence. [19:45] How motivational interviewing can shift conversations from conflict to collaboration. If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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A Sense of Control: How Students Achieve Academic Success With Less Stress 31:38

22 weeks temu31:38

31:38

In this episode of The Self-Driven Child Podcast, I’m joined by the brilliant Dr. Bill Stixrud, co-author of The Self-Driven Child and What Do You Say? We dive into the challenges parents face around academic pressure, mental health, and helping kids find their way without being overwhelmed by stress. Bill shares powerful insights on why a sense of control is so essential to young people's mental well-being, and we explore practical strategies for fostering resilience, decision-making, and problem-solving skills in children. This episode is perfect for parents, educators, or anyone working with kids who wants to learn how to support them better without adding more pressure. If you're looking to understand how to motivate your kids without micromanaging or forcing change, you’ll love what we have to share. Tune in as we unpack the importance of being a “consultant” to your child and how building strong, empathetic connections can reduce stress and improve mental health. Episode Highlights: [00:00] – Introduction to the episode and discussing the importance of the parent consultant approach. [2:33] – The connection between academic pressure and adolescent mental health, and why it’s a global issue. [5:58] – Why a sense of control is key to mental health, and how we can foster that in our kids. [8:17] – How increasing a child’s sense of control improves both their learning and decision-making. [9:14] – Five key principles for parents to raise self-driven children, with connection being the foundation. [11:48] – Exploring the consultant approach: empowering kids to solve their own problems. [21:53] – How to reduce stress for both you and your child by changing the way you approach decisions. [24:31] – The power of letting kids make their own decisions and learn from their mistakes. Links & Resources: If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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Grades, Rakes, and Reflection: Helping Kids Do Less To Do Better - With Teacher & Writer Tim Donahue 49:52

24 weeks temu49:52

49:52

In this episode, I sit down with Tim Donahue, a seasoned high school English teacher and a writer, to dive into the pressures of grade inflation, the impact on student resilience, and why kids today feel overwhelmed by academic and extracurricular demands. Tim’s unique perspective, drawn from years in the classroom and as a published writer, sheds light on how grade inflation and the drive for high grades may actually be compromising students' learning and mental health. Together, we explore how students and parents can navigate the academic landscape to foster genuine learning, creativity, and stress tolerance. Tim also shares his insights on the importance of doing less to achieve more, advocating for a balanced approach that prioritizes reflection and meaningful engagement over relentless achievement. Episode Highlights: [04:12] - Discussing grade inflation and its effects on teaching, learning, and the integrity of feedback. [08:13] - The role of resilience in education and how students benefit from realistic feedback, even if it means lower grades. [12:00] - How inflated grades can deprive students of vital information about their strengths and weaknesses. [17:18] - Examining the disconnect between high school and college expectations, and the effect on students’ mental health. [23:37] - Tim’s passion for “less is more” and the importance of brevity and reflection in learning. [36:39] - The impact of recreational screen time on student well-being and the hidden benefits of spending time in nature. [43:27] - Finding peace and mindfulness through activities like raking leaves and the restorative power of nature. Links & Resources: https://www.nytimes.com/2020/03/25/opinion/coronavirus-scream.html https://www.wsj.com/arts-culture/television/what-high-schoolers-need-to-start-the-year-seinfeld-style-griping-cea5f83d https://www.nytimes.com/2023/10/23/opinion/grade-inflation-high-school.html https://www.nytimes.com/2024/09/07/opinion/high-school-students-free-time.html https://hechingerreport.org/teacher-voice-how-the-sad-shadow-of-book-banning-shuts-down-conversations-and-lacerates-librarians/ https://www.easthamptonstar.com/guestwords-opinion/20211021/guestwords-consider-rake https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26168472/ If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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Brainless Education: A Conversation About the Brain Science Too Often Ignored in Most Schools 47:25

25 weeks temu47:25

47:25

Welcome to The Self-Driven Child podcast! In this episode, I chat with Dr. William Stixrud, co-author of The Self-Driven Child, to explore the concept of “brainless education” and why the way we approach learning in schools often overlooks the very organ meant to do the learning: the brain. We explore how prioritizing stress reduction, sleep, and autonomy for students can revolutionize not just their academic success, but also their mental health and intrinsic motivation. Together, we discuss how giving kids more control over their learning and personal lives can foster better stress tolerance and deeper engagement with education. Dr. Stixrud shares research-based insights, and we provide actionable ideas on how educators, parents, and students themselves can shift toward a brain-friendly approach. Episode Highlights: [01:58] - Dr. William Stixrud explains the low levels of student motivation and mental health issues [04:30] - How schools often act as a major source of stress and anxiety for students [06:12] - The success of Transcendental Meditation for medical students and its positive effects on learning [08:48] - The three pillars of healthy brain function: learning, mental health, and motivation [09:24] - How stress impacts the prefrontal cortex and executive function [12:27] - The importance of the hippocampus and the damaging effects of stress on memory [18:56] - The critical role of sleep in memory retention and emotional regulation [20:45] - How sleep deprivation increases stress and worsens anxiety [25:41] - Developing a sense of control and its importance in mental health [31:59] - Intrinsic vs. extrinsic motivation: how autonomy enhances learning [37:16] - Supporting autonomy in schools and how it improves student outcomes [42:19] - The argument for making homework optional and ungraded to reduce stress [44:01] - Final thoughts: fostering a brain-friendly environment for students Links & Resources: If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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Parental (Over) Involvement & The Start of College - A Conversation with Jess Lahey 45:06

29 weeks temu45:06

45:06

In this episode of the Self Driven Child podcast, I'm thrilled to welcome back one of my favorite voices in parenting, Jess Lahey. Jess is a New York Times bestselling author, an educator, and someone who's been on the front lines of both teaching and parenting. We discuss the emotional rollercoaster that is the transition from high school to college—not just for our kids, but for us as parents too. We talk about the balance between supporting our children and giving them the space to grow into their own people. Jess shares personal anecdotes about her own children's experiences, shedding light on the challenges and triumphs that come with this major life change. Jess gives insights on how to approach the first day of college, handle the inevitable bumps along the way, and most importantly, how to step back and let our kids take the reins. Episode Highlights: [00:42] - Introduction to the episode and guest Jess Lahey. [3:25] - Jess shares her experience with her children's transition to college. [7:09] - The importance of letting kids create their own identity in college. [14:24] - How to support your child without taking over, and the power of apology. [22:19] - Preparing kids for the unexpected challenges in college. [26:19] - The importance of helping kids build competence and a sense of control. [39:17] - Understanding why kids push away during major transitions and how to handle it. Links & Resources: https://www.cnn.com/2024/08/16/health/college-student-independence-wellness/index.html https://www.jessicalahey.com/comingofageinthemiddle/2015/6/21/season-of-the-malcontents If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

The Self-Driven Child

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What Do You Say? Why we LOVE Book #2! 27:19

33 weeks temu27:19

27:19

In this episode, I sit down with my co-author, Dr. William R. Stixrud, to do an origin story into the key concepts from our latest book, "What Do You Say?: How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home". We discuss the crucial importance of connection between parents and children, exploring how empathy and validation can transform relationships and foster mental well-being. Bill shares insights from our research and experiences, highlighting the profound impact of close relationships on kids' stress levels and overall happiness. Tune in as we unpack practical strategies for effective communication and building stronger bonds with your children. Episode Highlights: [01:37] - Bill discusses the motivation behind writing our second book, "What Do You Say?". [03:13] - The challenges of balancing control and fostering independence in children. [06:57] - The unexpected mental health risks in high-achieving children. [08:19] - The power of empathy and validation in strengthening parent-child connections. [10:25] - How reflective listening can enhance communication and trust. [12:25] - The importance of understanding before judging in parent-child interactions. [18:27] - Real-life stories illustrating the impact of empathetic responses. Links & Resources: Get the book: What Do You Say?: How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home by Dr. William R. Stixrud and Ned Johnson Website: Get the Top 10 Tips from Our Books: https://www.theselfdrivenchild.com Submit questions: Bill@theselfdrivenchild.com or Ned@theselfdrivenchild.com High Schoolers College Prep: https://prepmatters.com/ or call (301) 951-0350 If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com…

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