Exploring the feeling of “aloneness”

The Kim Kogane Show

In this episode, I share what’s been on my mind lately which is the feeling of being alone. It’s something that I’ve carried with me since I was young. I talk about fate versus free will and explore the idea that maybe what we’re feeling is intentional and points us towards something we need to call in. There are a lot of things outside of our control in the world, but we get to choose our thoughts and how we view the world around us. I encourage you to give this episode a listen if you’re feeling the pull to dive deeper and confront your own feelings that might be guiding you towards something important.

Timestamps

[1:23] Align + Flow meditation and intention setting workshop announcement

[2:48] Thoughts on finding purpose and free will v. fate

[3:43] My life lesson is learning how to be independent and being unapologetically myself

[4:09] Exploring “aloneness”

[4:42] Acknowledging that I was a loner growing up even though I was super involved in activities

[5:41] My feeling of being alone has carried with me since I was young and it’s time to confront it

[6:11] Acknowledging that I’m a people pleaser while also being very independent and that’s okay!

[7:18] I feel like I don’t want to burden others and too much alone time makes me feel invisible.

[7:40] Sometimes things happen that can reaffirm negative beliefs we hold about ourselves like when I wasn’t invited to a gathering and felt forgotten

[8:28] It was hard to be forgotten off the list and hurt

[8:55] Intention and impact are different

[9:10] This event reaffirmed the belief that I’m alone

[9:50] I feel alone in my experience and unsure what to do about it

[10:08] Are these feelings by design?

[10:24] Trying to make feelings go away often creates more frustration

[11:47] We are transitioning into a different season that is inward facing

[12:20] What am I being called to learn with these deep feelings of “aloneness”?

[13:18] Feeling alone creates a desire for connection

[13:50] This feeling of being alone is here because it’s calling me to something

[14:18] All kinds of connection are important from family and close friends to the people at your local coffee shop

[15:01] We all need all kinds of connection throughout our life. Different periods will have different levels of connection versus aloneness

[15:32] Feelings are not facts

[15:47] Our minds love to create stories and we don’t actually know what others are thinking about us

[16:06] How can I create a new set of beliefs and thoughts to live by

[16:33] Our minds can only hold a limited amount of information and create a filter with which to see the world

[17:40] I can’t choose what is outside of me, but I do have control over my thoughts, beliefs, and intentions

[18:08] I often feel really stuck, and maybe I’m ready to shift

[18:30] There’s power to speaking your thoughts out loud and getting it out of your head

[19:19] You are always welcome to share your thoughts with me and I want this relationship to be a two way connection.

[19:47] Creating community is really important to me

[20:27] I hope you find a way to express what is on your mind and I am ready to listen when/if you feel ready

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